Tuesday, October 27, 2009
I was incredibly stocked when I first learned of the Arctic Monkeys.
But I was soon informed they weren't Inuits covering the works of Michael Nesmith and then not so much....
But I was soon informed they weren't Inuits covering the works of Michael Nesmith and then not so much....
Breathe, damn you! Breathe!!....
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Just taking the time that being ill has given me to type up and post this little diatribe. Amazing what a "little" extra mucus will do to your outlook...
Q’s RE: Sexy Back
I know I shouldn’t… I really shouldn’t… but I can’t help it. “They” have been playing the song too often and now people are using it as a quick quip/quote.
OK. Justin Timberlake is bringing sexy back. Justin is bringing it back. Tends to imply that he took it away in the first place, doesn’t it? I’m not saying he flat out said he took it. It wouldn’t stand up in a court of law. But still…
If he took it, when and why? When Brittany flit(-head)-ed out of his life? Interesting that he brought it back after he started seeing Charlize Theron, isn‘t it? If that was the case, I think we’d all understand and he really ought to fess up. But if he didn’t, who did?
Who took the sexy? And how did Justin get his hands on it? I mean… There just seems to be something missing to the story. What isn’t Justin telling us? Why didn’t anyone bother to tell us the sexy was gone? Nothing. Not one word in the press: CNN, ABC, FOX, Drudge, not even Google News….
Some kind of warning would have been nice. We all could have kept an eye open and then Justin and Timbaland wouldn’t have had to bear all the pressure of bringing the sexy back. Justin’s album might have been finished months earlier. Missy Elliot might have gotten another one out. Hell, we may have finally heard a solo album from Timbaland. But no… they had to go all QT and need to know...
There should have been some sort of alert; probably some sort of number or letter alert. Hurricanes get names, missing kids have the Amber Alert system, terrorism is all color-coordinated….
Was it al Quida? Did Osama take the sexy? (Lord knows he could use all the help he can get; mountain goats are notoriously picky.)
And was Justin the right man for the job? I’m not an expert, but I understand he’s a sexy young man, but professionally he’s an entertainer. Wouldn’t a strike team made up of Queer Eye, What Not to Wear, Dr. 90210, Blow Out and Miami Ink have been better? Then again, that may be overkill.
The most important question that this raises, however, is did we really need the sexy back all that badly if we didn’t even notice it was gone in the first place? Maybe we can get along with just a little sexy. After all, isn’t down-sizing, conservation, doing-more-with-less all the rage?
We could… we could have passed the hat, have a fund-raiser. “If you have any sexy laying about…”. Just talk to people, y’know? Ask Antonio Banderas for some spare sexy. He is too much the sexy. According to Horatio Sanz, and Horatio is the arbiter of all things sexy, after all…
So thanks, Justin. Thanks soooo much. I’ve got this song stuck in my head and it won’t go away.
Damn you, Justin Timberlake. Damn you and the groove you rode in on.
Q’s RE: Sexy Back
I know I shouldn’t… I really shouldn’t… but I can’t help it. “They” have been playing the song too often and now people are using it as a quick quip/quote.
OK. Justin Timberlake is bringing sexy back. Justin is bringing it back. Tends to imply that he took it away in the first place, doesn’t it? I’m not saying he flat out said he took it. It wouldn’t stand up in a court of law. But still…
If he took it, when and why? When Brittany flit(-head)-ed out of his life? Interesting that he brought it back after he started seeing Charlize Theron, isn‘t it? If that was the case, I think we’d all understand and he really ought to fess up. But if he didn’t, who did?
Who took the sexy? And how did Justin get his hands on it? I mean… There just seems to be something missing to the story. What isn’t Justin telling us? Why didn’t anyone bother to tell us the sexy was gone? Nothing. Not one word in the press: CNN, ABC, FOX, Drudge, not even Google News….
Some kind of warning would have been nice. We all could have kept an eye open and then Justin and Timbaland wouldn’t have had to bear all the pressure of bringing the sexy back. Justin’s album might have been finished months earlier. Missy Elliot might have gotten another one out. Hell, we may have finally heard a solo album from Timbaland. But no… they had to go all QT and need to know...
There should have been some sort of alert; probably some sort of number or letter alert. Hurricanes get names, missing kids have the Amber Alert system, terrorism is all color-coordinated….
Was it al Quida? Did Osama take the sexy? (Lord knows he could use all the help he can get; mountain goats are notoriously picky.)
And was Justin the right man for the job? I’m not an expert, but I understand he’s a sexy young man, but professionally he’s an entertainer. Wouldn’t a strike team made up of Queer Eye, What Not to Wear, Dr. 90210, Blow Out and Miami Ink have been better? Then again, that may be overkill.
The most important question that this raises, however, is did we really need the sexy back all that badly if we didn’t even notice it was gone in the first place? Maybe we can get along with just a little sexy. After all, isn’t down-sizing, conservation, doing-more-with-less all the rage?
We could… we could have passed the hat, have a fund-raiser. “If you have any sexy laying about…”. Just talk to people, y’know? Ask Antonio Banderas for some spare sexy. He is too much the sexy. According to Horatio Sanz, and Horatio is the arbiter of all things sexy, after all…
So thanks, Justin. Thanks soooo much. I’ve got this song stuck in my head and it won’t go away.
Damn you, Justin Timberlake. Damn you and the groove you rode in on.
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Adventures of a Caffeinated Librarian
Odd day last Thursday:
I helped an older black lady (who may have actually been African American. It’s hard to tell; she didn’t say and I didn’t think to ask) find her grandfather or gr-grandfather in the Census Records on Ancestry.com. He was a former slave who was freed when he volunteered to fight for the South.
She was rather embarrassed to mention it, which I understand with the rampant PC-ness that severely needs quashing. It’s nothing to me, ‘cause the way I figure it there were a number of people who were against slavery that fought for the South but for states rights taking precedent over the slavery issue and a number of pro-slavery people that fought for the North because they thought the Fed should take precedent over the State. This was a fellow who saw fighting for the South as being his way out of slavery and I'm supposed to have a problem with that....
Is it better to do the right thing for the wrong reason or to be in the right while you’re doing wrong? Don’t ask me, I’m still digesting the fact that Wash is dead…..
--------------------------------------------------------
Then I lied to two itty-bitties while on the job.
I was helping a kiddie-garder find some horse stories while her younger sister tagged along. The smaller one kept looking at me and finally asked what was on my nose. I eventually figured out she meant the flesh-coloured mole next to my right nostril.
Without thinking about it, I said I was growing another nose.
4 big eyes asked why.
I had a friend who lost his nose in a bad accident and we were cloning another one. Once it gets big enough we're going to the hospital and he'll have an operation to attach it to his face.
What happened to your friend?
Well, there was this skunk involved and it smelt so bad that his nose exploded.
I then tried to let them know I was just storying, but after the older of the two said "That's good because lying is wrong", I'm not sure they understood.
And then they'll tell their folks and will be praised for their imagination....
And the kid's will be thinking "but the librarian said.....".
Destroying our future two children at a time, I am.
--------------------------------------------------------
Read a children’s bio on HA & Margret Rey (Curious George) @ lunch because it was there and an adult bio on the couple doesn’t seem to exist. Short version: they were German Jews who met in Brazil and escape from Paris just a day or two before the Nazis rolled in on bicycles that HA built!! George (under another name) was created before they bugged out, but I think his riding a bike was influenced by the escape. And on top of that, HA had a big yellow hat.
Nazis, hats, exotic locales, narrow escapes with manuscripts…. It was like Indiana Jones without the whip.
--------------------------------------------------------
One lady came up to check out a new edition of Dumbo on dvd, which I didn’t know was out, and I proceeded to spew nonsense:
What? Dumbo! I didn’t know this was out. I’m gonna have to pick this up. The missus is into the “girly” Disney films: Cinderella, Snow White and such, but give me a drunk elephant and a mouse in a tiny band marching band uniform and I’m happy.
--------------------------------------------------------
One of the librarians has vowed to kiss a pig if 3000 kids sign up for the summer reading program @ her branch. I’ve had way too many questions about this event:
How far in advance does one need to book a pig? You never know when there might be a sudden surge in pig rentals and you wouldn’t want to be left in the lurch.
How much does if cost to rent a pig? Is it by the hour or flat rate? Does it fluctuate with hog futures? Do you need to make a deposit? Take out insurance?
How does one locate pig rentals? They're not listed in the phone book. And how to check their references?
Do they have to be bonded or licensed? If so, is there a test, a study guide?
How often are the pigs checked for transmittable diseases?
Since there will also be a dunk tank at the event, would it better to get dunked before or after kissing said pig?
At what point does it change from good, old-fashioned pig-kissin' to bestiality? If the pig struggles (implying an unwillingness to be kissed)? If there's tongue involved? What if it was the pig's tongue? Could the pig then be charged? If the pig is under-aged, could pig-kissing be considered contributing to the delinquency of a minor?
And others I'm likely forgetting...
This day's question was:
Would it be a good idea to try to find some ham-flavored lipstick to make the pig more comfortable?
--------------------------------------------------------
Afterwards, I wondered aloud to Mrs. Sivana (after being somewhat chastised for lying about her Disney preferences in the impromptu Dumbo routine above) why, if we have jerked beef, we don’t have choked chicken? This devolved into an idea to open combo gas-station and fast food joint, like those that have been popping up over the last few years: a combo Kum-n-Go/Alexi’s Jerked Beef & Choked Chicken BBQ. Just to see how quickly it would go out of business….
She then had an odd observation. She’s been getting into reading fan-fiction (mostly Trigun and Fatal Frame-related stuff) and has noted that there is a good amount of male-on-male slash-fiction (aka m\m) with varying degrees of slashiness. The odd thing is most of it is written by women.
OK. So my understanding is that while men overall seem to be enthusiastic about lesbian pron, women aren’t that into gay pron (even the ones who are into pron in genital….. errr, general). Meanwhile, women will churn out gay fiction (pron to semi-pron) until the cows come home (or in this case, steers), while men write straight…..
Am I missing something? I mean other than half my brain and one more cup of coffee…?
After some other rambly oddments about Jack Sparrow, Blake’s 7 and the comic relief loving rag on Dr. Who, the evening devolved into making fun of cat butts. It was then that Mrs Sivana decided I needed to go to bed…..
All in all, that was probably the best day I’ve had in some time.
Until Saturday. But that, my fiends, is a tale best left untold.
At least until the statute of limitations is up.....
Odd day last Thursday:
I helped an older black lady (who may have actually been African American. It’s hard to tell; she didn’t say and I didn’t think to ask) find her grandfather or gr-grandfather in the Census Records on Ancestry.com. He was a former slave who was freed when he volunteered to fight for the South.
She was rather embarrassed to mention it, which I understand with the rampant PC-ness that severely needs quashing. It’s nothing to me, ‘cause the way I figure it there were a number of people who were against slavery that fought for the South but for states rights taking precedent over the slavery issue and a number of pro-slavery people that fought for the North because they thought the Fed should take precedent over the State. This was a fellow who saw fighting for the South as being his way out of slavery and I'm supposed to have a problem with that....
Is it better to do the right thing for the wrong reason or to be in the right while you’re doing wrong? Don’t ask me, I’m still digesting the fact that Wash is dead…..
--------------------------------------------------------
Then I lied to two itty-bitties while on the job.
I was helping a kiddie-garder find some horse stories while her younger sister tagged along. The smaller one kept looking at me and finally asked what was on my nose. I eventually figured out she meant the flesh-coloured mole next to my right nostril.
Without thinking about it, I said I was growing another nose.
4 big eyes asked why.
I had a friend who lost his nose in a bad accident and we were cloning another one. Once it gets big enough we're going to the hospital and he'll have an operation to attach it to his face.
What happened to your friend?
Well, there was this skunk involved and it smelt so bad that his nose exploded.
I then tried to let them know I was just storying, but after the older of the two said "That's good because lying is wrong", I'm not sure they understood.
And then they'll tell their folks and will be praised for their imagination....
And the kid's will be thinking "but the librarian said.....".
Destroying our future two children at a time, I am.
--------------------------------------------------------
Read a children’s bio on HA & Margret Rey (Curious George) @ lunch because it was there and an adult bio on the couple doesn’t seem to exist. Short version: they were German Jews who met in Brazil and escape from Paris just a day or two before the Nazis rolled in on bicycles that HA built!! George (under another name) was created before they bugged out, but I think his riding a bike was influenced by the escape. And on top of that, HA had a big yellow hat.
Nazis, hats, exotic locales, narrow escapes with manuscripts…. It was like Indiana Jones without the whip.
--------------------------------------------------------
One lady came up to check out a new edition of Dumbo on dvd, which I didn’t know was out, and I proceeded to spew nonsense:
What? Dumbo! I didn’t know this was out. I’m gonna have to pick this up. The missus is into the “girly” Disney films: Cinderella, Snow White and such, but give me a drunk elephant and a mouse in a tiny band marching band uniform and I’m happy.
--------------------------------------------------------
One of the librarians has vowed to kiss a pig if 3000 kids sign up for the summer reading program @ her branch. I’ve had way too many questions about this event:
How far in advance does one need to book a pig? You never know when there might be a sudden surge in pig rentals and you wouldn’t want to be left in the lurch.
How much does if cost to rent a pig? Is it by the hour or flat rate? Does it fluctuate with hog futures? Do you need to make a deposit? Take out insurance?
How does one locate pig rentals? They're not listed in the phone book. And how to check their references?
Do they have to be bonded or licensed? If so, is there a test, a study guide?
How often are the pigs checked for transmittable diseases?
Since there will also be a dunk tank at the event, would it better to get dunked before or after kissing said pig?
At what point does it change from good, old-fashioned pig-kissin' to bestiality? If the pig struggles (implying an unwillingness to be kissed)? If there's tongue involved? What if it was the pig's tongue? Could the pig then be charged? If the pig is under-aged, could pig-kissing be considered contributing to the delinquency of a minor?
And others I'm likely forgetting...
This day's question was:
Would it be a good idea to try to find some ham-flavored lipstick to make the pig more comfortable?
--------------------------------------------------------
Afterwards, I wondered aloud to Mrs. Sivana (after being somewhat chastised for lying about her Disney preferences in the impromptu Dumbo routine above) why, if we have jerked beef, we don’t have choked chicken? This devolved into an idea to open combo gas-station and fast food joint, like those that have been popping up over the last few years: a combo Kum-n-Go/Alexi’s Jerked Beef & Choked Chicken BBQ. Just to see how quickly it would go out of business….
She then had an odd observation. She’s been getting into reading fan-fiction (mostly Trigun and Fatal Frame-related stuff) and has noted that there is a good amount of male-on-male slash-fiction (aka m\m) with varying degrees of slashiness. The odd thing is most of it is written by women.
OK. So my understanding is that while men overall seem to be enthusiastic about lesbian pron, women aren’t that into gay pron (even the ones who are into pron in genital….. errr, general). Meanwhile, women will churn out gay fiction (pron to semi-pron) until the cows come home (or in this case, steers), while men write straight…..
Am I missing something? I mean other than half my brain and one more cup of coffee…?
After some other rambly oddments about Jack Sparrow, Blake’s 7 and the comic relief loving rag on Dr. Who, the evening devolved into making fun of cat butts. It was then that Mrs Sivana decided I needed to go to bed…..
All in all, that was probably the best day I’ve had in some time.
Until Saturday. But that, my fiends, is a tale best left untold.
At least until the statute of limitations is up.....
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
And now for something completely similar
The lark.
It's been a good long while since I've posted here, for a number of reasons: laziness, boredom, a number illnesses (the latest of which was shingles) and the fact that it's recently come to my attention that I'm nuts.
As in panic attack, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder nuts.
But enough of the humour. If I may get serious for a moment, I'd like to point your attention to this picture:
I grabbed it off some blog I wandered across and after seeing Mrs. Sivana's stunned look upon viewing it for the first time, knew that I had to share it with you, my adoring public.
Tomorrow I shall try to backtrack to the originating blog in an attempt to give appropriate credit.
I only hope this pair entered the costume contest (you know there had to have been one) and won.
The lark.
It's been a good long while since I've posted here, for a number of reasons: laziness, boredom, a number illnesses (the latest of which was shingles) and the fact that it's recently come to my attention that I'm nuts.
As in panic attack, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder nuts.
But enough of the humour. If I may get serious for a moment, I'd like to point your attention to this picture:
I grabbed it off some blog I wandered across and after seeing Mrs. Sivana's stunned look upon viewing it for the first time, knew that I had to share it with you, my adoring public.
Tomorrow I shall try to backtrack to the originating blog in an attempt to give appropriate credit.
I only hope this pair entered the costume contest (you know there had to have been one) and won.
Yaaawwwwnnnnn!!!
Stretches.
Scratches.
Blinks eyes a number of times.
Clears throat and rumbles groggily "Did I miss anything?"
Proceeds to fall back to sleep.
Stretches.
Scratches.
Blinks eyes a number of times.
Clears throat and rumbles groggily "Did I miss anything?"
Proceeds to fall back to sleep.
Monday, December 12, 2005
What Do You Get a Balrog for Christmas
(when he already has a tomb)?
I had the pleasure of finally hearing Meco's Christmas with the Stars a couple nights ago and the gears are already spinning in me 'ead. The Lord of the Rings actors need to get together and remake this, converting the Star Wars references into Middle-Earth ones. And as a special bonus, they need to include a hidden track at the end: Ian McKellen doing a recitation of The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins, over the music from Leonard Nimoy's version BUT with Shatnerized (i.e. spoken word) vocals.
For me, the whole gag would be for them to do it on the sly, w/o Peter Jackson's knowledge, and then present the first copy to him for next Christmas.
"But then, why should anyone listen to me, or should I speak, since I know nothing?"
(when he already has a tomb)?
I had the pleasure of finally hearing Meco's Christmas with the Stars a couple nights ago and the gears are already spinning in me 'ead. The Lord of the Rings actors need to get together and remake this, converting the Star Wars references into Middle-Earth ones. And as a special bonus, they need to include a hidden track at the end: Ian McKellen doing a recitation of The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins, over the music from Leonard Nimoy's version BUT with Shatnerized (i.e. spoken word) vocals.
For me, the whole gag would be for them to do it on the sly, w/o Peter Jackson's knowledge, and then present the first copy to him for next Christmas.
"But then, why should anyone listen to me, or should I speak, since I know nothing?"
I smell a lawsuit
(either that or I stepped in something...)
From the commercials for Rumor Has It..., I was beginning to think it was based of the premise of "What if the Graduate was a true story only presented as fiction?". Well, the plot outline on IMDB confirms my suspicions. And I, for one, am OUTRAGED!!
This is an obvious and total rip-off of the nigh-legendary film The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension, the premise of which is....
S
P
O
I
L
E
R
S
P
A
C
E
!
!
"What if Orson Welle's 'War of the Worlds' was a true story only presented as fiction?"!!!!
Warner Bro.s, Rob Reiner and Ted Griffin should be ashamed of themselves and have their collective pants sued off. I'll let Jennifer Aniston keep her pants, only 'cause she's already been having photographer issues and what with Brad's carousing... And, well, it's the holidays.
I know I have a problem with acting overly magnanimous this time of year; I really ought to seek treatment for it.
(either that or I stepped in something...)
From the commercials for Rumor Has It..., I was beginning to think it was based of the premise of "What if the Graduate was a true story only presented as fiction?". Well, the plot outline on IMDB confirms my suspicions. And I, for one, am OUTRAGED!!
This is an obvious and total rip-off of the nigh-legendary film The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension, the premise of which is....
S
P
O
I
L
E
R
S
P
A
C
E
!
!
"What if Orson Welle's 'War of the Worlds' was a true story only presented as fiction?"!!!!
Warner Bro.s, Rob Reiner and Ted Griffin should be ashamed of themselves and have their collective pants sued off. I'll let Jennifer Aniston keep her pants, only 'cause she's already been having photographer issues and what with Brad's carousing... And, well, it's the holidays.
I know I have a problem with acting overly magnanimous this time of year; I really ought to seek treatment for it.
Friday, December 02, 2005
The Blair Brown Project
3 film students travel to the wilds of Hollywood to make a documentary on why the Hell The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd hasn't been released on DVD and promptly disappear. Their film is later found under the corner of a Wahoo's Fish Tacos on Wilshire Blvd...
3 film students travel to the wilds of Hollywood to make a documentary on why the Hell The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd hasn't been released on DVD and promptly disappear. Their film is later found under the corner of a Wahoo's Fish Tacos on Wilshire Blvd...
There's booze in the bunker?!
I think Charlie and Ecko need to sit down and have a long talk with Libby and Ana Lucia...
I think Charlie and Ecko need to sit down and have a long talk with Libby and Ana Lucia...
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Is it at all odd that I introduced myself to two of my favorite bands (see the links in the side-bar) at the same time?On a whim, I decided to check out this show and I had no idea who any of them were....
Of course, Mellowdramatic Wallflowers has gone through some changes (Dang you, Jakob Dylan!!) and is now known as Admiral Twin.
Connection between the Time Trust and Infinite Crisis?
Yeah, I know... the german is execrable. It's been over 20 years since my classes and through disuse I was forced to make use of Babelfish. Maybe I'll clean it up for a reposting...
I made this pic using the Hetemeel site, which also has a cool dictionary set-up that I must make use of....
Yeah, I know... the german is execrable. It's been over 20 years since my classes and through disuse I was forced to make use of Babelfish. Maybe I'll clean it up for a reposting...
I made this pic using the Hetemeel site, which also has a cool dictionary set-up that I must make use of....
The definition of too much time on your hands
A Night at the Roddenberry
and the sequel:
A Night at the Hothberry
A Night at the Roddenberry
and the sequel:
A Night at the Hothberry
